Hey, we know theres nothing wrong with this, but this isnt what you want to hear after a night out! The second type is the good guy. He'll come out with you in freshers, and he's genuinely a brilliant kinda guy.
However, one drawback - this dude or dudetee doesn't go out. And we dont mean just doesn't go out, we mean, doesnt go out...EVER. His idea of a night out is a night in the library. These guys are usually from overseas, so you can't blame them for trying so hard. They've come so far and they wanna fo well, you can't hate a guy for that. Oh yeah, one extra thing....Yes, you've guessed it...he's gonna get a first! And if he doesn't get a first, don't take the mick outta him, he could easily end up killing you!
Advantages:
Doesn't spend any money on drink or going out - because he doesnt!
No need to buy an extra drink on that round you're offering!
He's gonna get a first.
Good contact to have - he'll be in power very soon!
If he's your roomy - you'll probably feel so guilty not working you'll probably get a first too!
Disadvantages:
This guy just doesn't go out.
If you want 'alone' time in your room, you'll probably never get it! (and we ALL need alone time...)
This guy seriously doesn't have a social life.
If he doesn't get a first, he'll probably murder you!
Conclusion: He's gonna get a first...just make sure he's your mate!
2. The 'I Sleep All Day & Wake at Night' Syndrome (AKA Bugglitis)
(Latin name: Sleepus MissLecturesAlotus)
This guy is great. He'll probably be in your little social group, there's loads of these guys. Usually more guys than girls, cos girls usually can't sleep for too long without fiddgeting or sumthing, well the ones I've been with anyway! Waaahaay!! (Sorry girls!) Anyway, you've gusssed it - this guy basically sleeps all throughout the day and wakes up in the evening. Usually around 8 or 9pm, he'll rise from the land of the dead and you'll all go and play pool together, you'll probably go to bed at a reasonable time, say 2 or 3am...and when you do, he'll find another bugglitis stricken guy to chill with, 'til bout 8 or 9am!
And when you've gotten up at 9am to go to lectures, sleepy eyed and rat-faced, this guy will STILL be up, claiming that hes gonna stay awake all day! Yeah right! He'll fall asleep by lunch, and the cycle will continue! Oh yeah, did we forget to mention this guy usually wont make lectures, cos hes sleeping! He'll usually be half knackered when he wakes up too! This lifestyle isn't for the weak!
Advantages:
Doesn't spend alot of money on food, cos he's usually asleep!
No need to fork out on travel costs, cos he's usually asleep!
He's a human alarm clock!
He's always awake in the evening if you have any problems while your out and stuff!
When you go out, he'll be the life of the party!
Disadvantages:
When this guy sleeps, boy he sleeps!
If he's your roomy, you will never get any time to yourself!
This guy doesn't get to lectures!
If he's your roomy, you'll have to live off the light of your laptop because this wa**er will always want the light off when he's sleeping!
Conclusion: Not healthy, plus you've gotto get sum study done, right?
3. The 'I'm Gonna Get Arrested at 8am for Exposure' Syndrome
(Latin name: Drinkus Allthetimeus)
Ah ha, ha ha ha ha! This lifestyle may seem the best, but we swear it'll catch up on you or your liver someday! And then you'll be mashed! Anyway, this lifestyle involves a drink, and not just a single drink, a double. Then a triple. Then a quad...yup, it goes on, and on, and on. Don't get the wrong impression, this guy isn't an alcoholic, no matter how much your warden may try and say you have.
Actually, one time we had a friend who was being told off for drinking by a real idiot of a warden, and when asked if he had a problem our friend replied 'No, I haven't - it's the first time I've had a drink in 3 months' to which the warden replied 'The first step to curing the problem is to admit you have one'. Needless to say, that warden was a right....!@#£$!>!*^$!!!!!
Anyway, so this guy goes to lectures and does makes notes, well sometimes! He or she will sleep normally, be normal, but get extremely naggered! NAGGERED GUVNA! And not just on the weekends, on most weekdays too! Uni with a hangover? These guys do it for a living!
Advantages:
Time goes quick! 'cos your naggered!
You can't remember the night before!
You can't remember the week before!
Always a good laff to be with!
You'll all have so many funny & crazy stories to tell people!
Disadvantages:
Spends alot of money on alcohol, and we mean alot!
If he's your roomy, you'll get scared, very scared!
Dangerous especially around bouncers of the fat and muscly kind.
He might start smelling like a human domestos.
If he pulls a lady, he could say something completely crazy!
Conclusion: Good for a bit, but the liver could start hurting!
Now lastly, the most common kind...well, we thought it was the most common! |
